My second mother is going through a serious illness right now, and medical bills are piling up.
Im asking for people to go to my fundraiser. Support, share & spread the word.
Every dollar counts!
So I sent my car off to the mechanic awhile ago, and well I was told the problem would be 450.00 and now its 2000.00… and for some reason the payment planes I was told I could make are going to be through a car loan? I’m not sure why things are taking a turn for the worse right now, but this is seriously the most stressful thing I think I’ve been through. Especially since I have to get this all done before May…
I’ve been teaching myself to just let things happen, because me trying to control it will just make things worse. I’m trying to keep calm and just remind myself that everything happens for a reason, but… I’m at my breaking point and I just need some help. Help… or questions answered.. or something here. A bone of any sort would be nice.
Obviously that’s not my only issue here but, enough negativity, im so grateful for the good in my life. An amazing boyfriend, a pretty alright job, a family that loves me, a roof over my head, and other great things that are making my life worth getting up every morning. Is it weird to say that im grateful for facebook? I really love me some facebook… like I don’t ever imagine my life where I wouldn’t be on facebook. Ha, im saying facebook to much.
Welcome to my mind thought process. But seriously, the point of that facebook thing is that im greatful for the finer things in life.
Taking it secret style here, Things in the future im grateful for: My beautiful well running car, my job promotion, my boyfriend coming home, & my bedroom reconstruction.
I hope everyone is well.
Blessed be, Kaylalarissax3
You know what I think about life? I think you re live your life over and over again until you finally get it right. Until you make all the right choices in life. For example, if you see someone carrying very heavy things into a door, and they need the door to be held open (man or women) you can either choose to be selfish and in “too much of a hurry” to help the fellow out, or you can take 5 seconds at the most to help them. A person who choose to help would more than likely end up in a higher place than the person that didnt. Because they’d be stuck on earth once again trying to finally get it right.
“I did my good deed for the day” is what I usually say, but honestly I think I try to be the very best I can possibly be to people. I do have a nasty temper at times, but Ive been able to tame it down a lot more lately. Im learning slowly but surely how to control my anger and Im okay with this. Honestly, I think ill have to relive this life over again. I just didnt get it right yet. Another example of what I mean, everyone always comes into contact with drugs (and just for the record Im not talking about pot, im not a stoner but I still dont believe that pot should even be considered as a drug) and you have the choice to go for it because “you only live once” or you can say no. Now this isnt a rant on how you should always say no to drugs because its your life and your choices either way I wont judge, but honestly they fxck you up and make you someone who you arent. ESPECIALLY when your addicted, and while your in this wrong state of mind you dont notice that your not the same person you where when you started this shit.
I believe the bible was made to scare people into being good people. Which isnt a bad thing, but you cant tell me that there is a man in the sky that cares if I eat meat on a Tuesday afternoon when the grass is growing and a cow just took a shit. Like… seriously people? I believe Jesus was a real person because if im not mistaken (but dont quote me) its scientifically proven that he was a real person. & I do thank him sometimes for the good in my life. I also thank the gods and goddess. So, I dont believe im wrong for that. Religion interests the fxck outta me tho, so I defiantly try to learn all I can about it all.
Being a good person will make you go to a good place. Thats how I honestly feel. Like if you take your bosses feelings into consideration over your own, because your late. Or you just try to make someone feel great when you can tell their down. Your a good person and your gonna go to a great place. If you try to make peoples lifes hell. You defiantly wont. But those are my views. I could be way off. 🙂
Is that how you believe or no? Lemme know.
Ooooooh, hello world! How I have missed you ever so much. Its been intresting these past few weeks. First of all im finally 18!!!! Something silly to be excited about, unless your a smoker like myself. Also I got to see Maroon 5 and I was on the floor! So that was so freaking epic! Oh and hello, did you notice? My webpage is now Ateenagewiccan.com!!! 😛 No more “.wordpress.com” hehe, another silly thing to be excited about I suppose, but if thats so then I enjoy the finer things in life.
Anyways, my mom had an epic experience during one of her meditations and I have been wanting so badly to share this story with the world. Sadly ive been to busy, but anyway- enough complaining on my part. Lets get to the fun stuff finally! OKAY! So, the other day my mom was in deep mediation, and she somehow just thought of a random word. When she was done with the mediation she looked the word up because it was really bugging her. She didnt know what the word meant, much less why she would think it. Anyway, so she types it into google and the first link was a book. A Wicca book called “the oneness”, I believe thats the name of the book but dont quote me. My mom was so excited, because she even said “a teacher is supposed to find me when im ready and then all of the suddenly it sends me to this book”? So of course she absolutely had to get it and even jokingly said “damn, that mediation cost me 20 bucks”. I just thought that was so awesome, and it also gives me another book to read once she is done :).
Another awesomely, yet strange, story. I had said in my last post that Ive been wanting to find out about my past live/life’s. So I got on youtube and did a “self hypnosis”. I this state of being hypnotized I learned that I was a Asian man named “Chong” and I worked as a receptionist for somewhere. Some other small details I have forgotten at this point. At first I wanted to be excited that maybe I was really finding out a little about a past life, but then again I started thinking… Maybeeeeee I was just trippin’. I dont know. Practice makes perfect, and plus self hypnosis is very very RELAXING. I just loved it so much. I tried doing it at my computer desk, but I gave up with that and pulled it up on my xbox. Haha.
Alrighty, well I think im pretty much caught up as of now.
I hope everyone is doing great! 🙂
Blessed be, Kaylalarissax3
So I’ve been reading so much about Wiccan already today. I realized that whenever Im ready then a teacher will come to me, and until then I should just read up. Honestly, at first I was a bummed out about that. I just wanted to jump straight into being a white witch. Then after a little more reading (of me trying to find a loophole so I could just do what I wanted) I realized I honestly have no idea what Im doing and I shouldnt just fully trust myself with magick right now. Even though I like to think of myself as way more mature than every teenager on the planet. Im still a teenager, and I still have crazy hormones and anger issues that I need to work out before I can trust myself with magick. Although, black magick scares me and I honestly dont think I would ever do anything to harm someone… I sometimes surprise my own self. Plus, I really enjoy reading about this religion and I want to get closer to the Gods as well. So it did take me a minute to realize, but I finally got it after learning that I didnt even know how to open or close a circle for Christ sake!
I really want to learn about my past life. I don’t know how to go about doing this. Theres always the obvious- Just go to a hypnotist and they can tell you. But if I’m hypnotised… how will I know if what their saying is legit? It could be totally bogus because they just want my money. And Im not saying thats everyone, but sometimes I just wonder how do you know who you can trust. Especially in this world, when anybody will do anything to make an extra buck. If anybody knows how to go about this, please let me know.
&& Last but not least, currently im reading “The Wiccan Handbook” by Eileen Holland. She says “studying mythology is time well spent” … or something along those lines. When I read that my heart and brain just did a little happy dance! This is because when I was in the 8th grade we were learning about mythology in English. I was absolutely in LOVE with this subject, and I remember the teacher and everybody else acting like they were crazy…. And then little ol’ Kayla thinking to herself “how is that crazy? Its how they believed… and honestly I’d like to have that as a religion, because they couldnt have been to terribly wrong”. Of course, I kept that to myself because Id rather not be the crazy of the school.. that day anyway. 🙂
Oh how my bed is calling me right now. I was two hours late to work today and still managed to work an 8 and a half hour shift. Not complaining though, im actually extremely grateful to the universe for giving me such a great job opportunity. So let me just tell you this story, because its actually freaking awesome! It all started when I was working “That sonic in friendswood” well, the boss and I had a falling out… Well, actually she pretty much chose a person she knew I wasn’t allowed to work with over me. When she acted like she was my mother. So I had to put my 2 weeks in for 2 reasons 1.) I wasn’t allowed to work with this girl. & 2.) I just really dislike this person. So yea, the 2 weeks was in and the boss wasn’t happy about this at all… Well, one day I was sick and I got this girl I didn’t like to cover my shift. Trust me, when your sick you’ll do anything to get the hell outta working. So she gets to work, and my boss kicks me out of the store because shes there….. bitch -_- oh well… because that night I told her to take me off the schedule. & then I thought I was done with Sonic forever.
Well, I did a little spell and all of the sudden I get a call from my old manager. She told me to fill out an application for her store she was working at now. So I did. Well she calls me back and tells me I need to call the head hancho, because he was very impressed with my application and… oh yeah, apparently my old supervisor is the supervisor of this store, and although sonic is not doing rehires. I got a good word (from this man that I honestly thought didnt care for me too much) and I got the job. & It has been a huge blessing. Im actually 100% happier at this new place. The Goddesses and Gods really had my back on that one!
So, I thought that was absolutely awesome but then to top it off I got a little glimpse of karma today. Getting off work today we were passing my old store. So I decided to go in and get the rest of my belongings. Come to find out they basically only have 5 employees at the store. & it really just looked like it was sinking fast. Which, honestly I feel bad in a way but in this same sentence im like well…. KARMA CAN BE A BITCH! But in all honesty Id help if they asked, and on my own schedule.
But thats just some well needed venting before bed so it probably seems a bit all over the place.
My life has been full of excitement lately so I haven’t really had the time for blogging. Which sucks, but there’s nothing I can do about it but make time when I can. So im sorry if I got you excited and then fell of the face of the earth. No worries, Ill be back for good soon. So lets get back to the good stuff.
I have started making my altar. There are still some key items I really need to get but I do have most of it already. Its a slow and steady project, and im absolutely loving how its coming together. In my room there is a garden window. & Ive always wanted to do something with it but never knew what to do. Finally when I was contemplating where I was going to put my altar. So it was like killing two birds with one stone kinda. Like I said I still need a bunch of things for my altar to be complete in the way that I am happy with it, but even the way it stands now. I really love it so far, but yes its not done. Anyway for the element Earth (north), I had got roses for valentines day from my love and I use the flowers to represent that. The vase and water is of course representing the Water (west), and also I have a blue candle. For Air (east) I use my drum sticks. Ever since I was 10 years old I have always wanted to have a drum set. When I finally got one on my 16th birthday it was the best day of my life. Although, now its like I never have the time for them I still love them. So I use my drum sticks as my “wand”. Last but not least, Fire (south), for fire I usually have a lighter on my alter, but I also have a red candle because I can never keep a lighter in one place. One of the awesome perks of being a smoker. I also have a bunch of stuffed animals, birthday card, and just other things that just make me feel special. I keep them away from any fire, and if you do the same just be careful because fire is involved and nobody wants to play with fire!
The things I really want to get for my altar is of course a pentacle. If I could just find a freaking shop around here! Of course, thats no excuse because I could always order it offline, but that’s another story. Also Id like to get athame, a god statue, a god candle and more things that just aren’t coming to mind. If you have any suggestions please let me know! Oooh, also I want to make my own cloths for my altar. I just need to learn how.
Another hobby I want to pick up is candle making. I love, love, love candles! & candle magick is what im totally obsessing over
So, once im done with this wonderful project I will post pictures! What does your altar look like?
Let me know, and Id love for some suggestions.